More proof 07.06.16

                Before we get started on today’s mesmerizing article, I would like to spend a few sentences explaining a word, which is kind of two words, and to the trained mind (me) doesn’t make any sense at all.

            As I was out for my morning stroll, a word popped into my head. That statement is not totally true, I had thought about this word early this morning while lying on my new mattress, meditating. It continues to amaze me how the, “word people”, get things so messed up.

            Acute, would mean serious or severe!

            A cute, could be a puppy!

            Here at, “The Ford Homestead Institute for The Study of, and Decoding of Grammar”, we have learned that a so called doctor, many years ago at a renowned school of lower learning, was teaching a student about serious illnesses. He told the student, “Never tell the patient that their condition is serious, always come up with a word that means serious to you, but not to them”.

The student asked, “What word should I use”? The doctor suggested that the student think of a cute puppy and he would come up with a word. The student thought about what the doctor had told him and Wala, the word “Acute”, came into existence!

You are correct, it is a strange world we live in!

Now to a more serious situation. I had recently posted evidence in the form of a photo that the aliens are watching me. I can only assume they want to learn from the Master, me. In today’s photo, (it is not a photo from the pecan tree), you will see the alien that has been watching me for the past three days. I decided to take a photo this morning, as evidence of this invasion at the Ford Homestead.

                If you look at this photo and can’t see the forehead, eyes and nose of the alien that has been watching me, you will never know when they are watching you. If you click on the photo you may even be able to see the alien’s mouth.

            My granddaughter thinks I am imagining these aliens, what does she know, she’s only nine years old.

            During my last session with my psychiatrist, I had told her about the aliens and asked if I was crazy. She explained that a person can have a good imagination and not be crazy, as long as this person does not believe these imagined aliens are real. On the other hand, if one imagines that aliens are watching them and they believe they are real, then that person is crazy.

            I explained that I did not believe they are real, my psychiatrist then declared, “I was not crazy”. I then told her I would like it if the aliens would stop watching me when I am sitting in my rocking chair every afternoon. 

Look around you, they are watching!

Don Ford

Four July, Twenty Sixteen

4^th of July, 2016

            One of the good things that happened years ago, was the banning of fireworks inside the city limits of Hewitt, TX. It stopped all those bad people from setting off the fireworks and possibly causing the older generation to miss some of their required, and may I say, well deserved sleep.

            The police will issue a fine to anyone participating in the practice of igniting any type of firework. In the following photo the two male subjects are not related to me in any way. No, it is not David and Alex, and they were not participating in the act of igniting fireworks.

 

 

Thank goodness I did not participate in this act of defiance against the Hewitt Government!

Be safe over the fourth!

Don Ford

            For that one observant person,

the above article was written on July 4^th,

and the illegal actions were taken on July 3^rd.

It worked 07/02/16

 

 

Connected to a tree, not the internet, they like the tire swing!

 

Have a good 4^th of July holiday!

Don Ford

Spilled Milk 07.01.16

            No I didn’t spill a glass of milk, at least not recently. I hope that delays the questions from that one person who always feels the need to ask some silly question, before I have had a chance to complete my explanation. 

            In today’s lesson I want to tell a story of a bogus person (for that one reader I want to explain that bogus in this setting means, not real) who became upset when they spilt a glass of milk. Instead of saying, “Darn it” and cleaning up the milk, this person became very upset! In this upset state they began snapping at everyone around them, causing the children to become very quiet, almost afraid to say anything.

            Let us consider the situation.

1.  The glass of milk is spilt, that can’t be changed.

2.  The milk needs to be cleaned up, that doesn’t change.

3.   Becoming upset, raising your voice, and snapping at those around you, will not clean up the spilled milk.

Why did this person lose their cool? There are many excuses for one losing one’s cool, but they are just excuses. The reasons are most likely, (1) that they have through most of their life observed others popping off any time anything went awry, rather than approaching in a controlled manner, (2) they have never taken the time to consider the effects of their ranting on others, or their own health.

            Life’s lessons, are not always easily learned, and are difficult to teach, as some people don’t believe they have a problem, or, just don’t want to listen.

Sometimes we don’t see the need to change our habitual bad actions. Most likely we consider our actions normal, and if someone attempts to point them out to us we become defensive, and refuse to listen or consider the advice that is being offered.

The most effective method of creating change is when we ourselves, realize the need, either through self-evaluation, or considering a comment from someone, which is basically self-evaluation.

It may be hard to believe, I use to explode at almost anything, then one day as I was working on a project in the garage I dropped a handful of nuts and bolts. They hit the floor and spread out over the floor. It just happened that I was in a very good mood for some reason, and dropping the nuts and bolts did not trip my trigger. I looked at the bolts on the floor, I smiled and said, “If that is the worst thing that happens today, it will be a good day!”

Later in the day, I thought about my positive reaction to dropping the nuts and bolts. I remembered smiling and saying, if that is the worst thing that happens today, it will be a good day! I thought it actually felt good to have smiled and made a positive comment, compared to becoming upset and blowing my stack.

I considered that I should react positively to situations that have often tripped my trigger. I had come to this self-realization without outside intervention. In other words, “It was my idea, and since I thought of it, I liked it!”

           

            Just in case you have read this entire article but have not grasped the point;

That lesson is, “when faced with a negative and upsetting situation, smile and take a positive approach”. Although I am not always able to stay positive in upsetting situations, I find that a smile and this simple phrase, “If that is the worse that happens today, it will be a good day!”

Now on a different subject:

            I was sitting all alone on my old worn out rocker, in the shade near the garage door, the temperature was 96 degrees, and I did have a fan running, attempting to keep me somewhat cool.

            The neighborhood was quiet, as it was too hot for anyone other than me to be outside. That is when I heard it! This sound was coming from behind me, and the sound was of something falling through the tree limbs. I quickly turned to see a large rusty red colored hawk, falling like a rock, and then spreading its wings just prior to hitting the ground. He flew up to the top of the power pole and adjusted what he had in his talons, as several mocking birds flew at him in protest.

            After a few seconds this big hawk flew away with the bird in his claws.

Smile and be positive about situations!

Don Ford           

                What, who has a question? Oh, it’s you again. What’s the question?

You want to know how anyone could be positive about the hawk story.

            Smile, be happy that you are not the bird!

            I guarantee the hawk was smiling and happy that lunch was at hand!

Become a swinger 06.28.16

            Have you ever wanted to be a swinger? Being a swinger could be fun, but as we all know has some risks involved, due to the nature of swinging with others that we, do not know. 

            I would like to stray from the subject just for a few sentences if I may. I would like to tell you about being invisible. There was a presentation on the TV the other day about a cloak of invisibility which kind of worked. I have now learned, like many things, invisibility is in the eye of the beholder.

            This tale, is completely factual and that means it is one of the few true tales that has, or will, come from this author.

            My spouse of 47 years and I had brunch at the Cracker barrel and as usual, I was banished to the Ford’s Chevy while my spouse shopped. Finally after what seemed to be many hours of waiting, my first wife came out of the store carrying a package with many lovely items in it, none were for me.

My present wife stopped about 15 feet from the Ford’s Chevy and looked around the parking area. I sat there in the vehicle looking at her as she seemed to look right through me and the pickup. At first I thought it was odd that she would not see a white Chevy pickup with a nice looking gentlemen sitting in the driver’s seat, then I realized that I, along with the pickup, were totally invisible.

I do not know how it happened but I and the vehicle could not be seen. As I sit there marveling at this miracle, my first wife looked around the parking area again, and still did not see the white pick up or the hansom driver.

Finally, I, along with the pickup became visible to mortals again, and my first spouse saw me and the pickup. She came to the truck and got in. I asked, why did you stand there looking around when I and my truck were right in front of you? Her response was, “the truck looked too big so I thought it wasn’t our truck”. Can you believe my first spouse would think of my truck as small!

Let’s see now, what was this tale supposed to be about?  I remember now, “Being a swinger”. As we all know, I am always working on something which is my way of keeping my thought process (brain) working properly. I have a few photos that will show the immense amount of work that I have put into this project and I am still not done.

First we have a front tire from my gold wing with a hole drilled into it. This hole is to be a drain, to let water out of the tire.

 

            I then decided to make another hole in the opposite side of the tire and insert a rope into the hole.

 

I was going to tie a knot in the rope and then decided for safety reasons, I would add a PVC, Tee fitting, which will keep the rope from exiting the hole, making it safer for the swinger, assuming someone will want to swing on it. 

 

I need to get a ladder out of the shed and climb up to a limb, where I can secure the rope, allowing it to be accessible to the grand kids. I never had a tire swing as a kid but my neighbor did.

There are various types of swingers!

Finished  

 

Don Ford

New tires 06.27.16

            When you own a motorcycle you must maintain it and that includes things like new tires. I checked at the cycle shop and a new back tire was $249.99. That seems a little high to me so I passed. For some unknown reason I received an email from a company called Wing Stuff. They had two tires (front and back) on sale for $299.99 with free shipping. That deal is already better than the bike shop. There was an additional incentive and it was a $50.00 mail in rebate, which made the total cost for two tires $249.99.

            I ordered the tires, they arrived in three days. I have always been told to get the new tires on the bike as soon as possible, and go for a ride. That is exactly what I did, see the two tires, one on the seat and one on top the other tire and it is also on the rack on the trunk. I strapped the tires on the bike and whet for a nice long ride, but I did not notice any difference in the ride. I did get some strange looks from people I saw along the way.

 

            I thought new tires would make the ride much better, possibly smoother, but I couldn’t feel any difference in the ride. It isn’t as comfortable riding with the new tires strapped to the back seat and I can’t take my present spouse with me, when those new tires are on the seat.

            Why have new tires if they don’t improve the ride!

Different story, same world!       

            It was a lovely Sunday afternoon, ok it was hot and steamy on this Sunday afternoon, as I headed out to the shed behind the Ford Homestead. I needed to retrieve a couple items from the shed as I had a small project I was working on. I entered the shed and was in the shed for no more than a minute when I began to hear a buzzing sound. It kind of sounded like bees but I assumed it was a machine of some type making the sound.

Having procured the items I needed, I stepped out of the shed and then quickly learned what was making the buzzing sound. There were thousands of bees flying around the neighbor’s tree. I stood there looking at these bees thinking this could be a bad thing.

I walked to the house and retrieved my camera with the telephoto lens. This took all of maybe three or four minutes and I returned to the scene of the infestation. The bees were no longer flying around the tree, hey had instead found a limb and were now occupying it. A couple photos to follow.

 

 

They are high up in the tree, you may be able to click on the photos for a better view. Maybe they will go away tomorrow.

            I have reconditioned an old stool so both grand kids will have a place to sit when at my desk in the computer room. In the photo below the stool is on an old box, I did not want to paint my grass red, so I put the stool on a box and painted.

 

I am good with a spray paint can!

Don Ford

Erections 06.22.16

            Two erections in the last ten days, the first failed, the second seems to be holding.

            Yesterday I mowed the grass and it was 96 degrees with high humidity. I did get all the weeds wacked in the ditch behind the Ford Homestead a couple days ago.

My present spouse has informed me that she is going to allow me to go with her and shop for a new mattress. Our present mattress is kind of old and it isn’t comfortable. Have you seen the price of a mattress? They are selling these things at prices that are marked up from 5 to 15 times the cost, and we the public are dumb enough to pay their price.

            The average mattress cost the retailer from $127.00 to $243.00, then they have to add their markup, and we are expected to buy them. A mattress store does have overhead, and they are somewhat like a car dealer, they don’t sell 10 or 20 mattresses every day. So like car dealers, they need to have a big markup just to stay in business. We ordered a mattress but will not get it until next week (donations will be accepted, mark them as, “Rest for the Fords”.)

            As I was sitting here at the Ford’s desk attempting to provide you, the recipient, an article that would be worthy of your evaluation, Molly decided to, shall we say, “take charge of the desk”. As you will see in the photo below, Molly was tired and needed to rest.

 

            Anyway, I have gotten off the subject, I have now erected the kid’s pool but the kids are out of town! All that work and no one to say, “Nice job Papaw”! I guess that is kinda normal for the retired community, we work ourselves to death, and no one notices.  Poor me!

            Different subject, the last rain we had provided us with almost 4 inches in one night and now we are watering the flowers and garden on a regular basis. I have even noticed cracks in the ground out near the shed. That being said, all the lakes and rivers are still full of runoff water.

            Tuesday was the first full day of summer! The days are now getting shorter, can winter be far behind?             I am you are never satisfied.

Enjoy today, tomorrow may be different!

Don Ford

Snap, craple and pop 06.20.16

            Yep, I know what I wrote as a title, do you? Crap can mean anything, and craple not only rimes with crackle, it has a more inspirational meaning to it. 

Occasionally I find it necessary to create a new word, which by the way, drives my spouse of 47 years crazy! She seems to think I do it all the time verbally, I am not saying she is wrong, but she could allow a senior citizen a little leeway, in the creation of new vocabulary.

By continuing to read this properly composed article, about a partial day in the life of the Fords, you may learn of happiness and sadness beyond belief.

It was a Friday afternoon, the temperature was 95 and the humidity was about 200%. David, Alex and I had drove down to Baylor University to pick Gabi up after class. Yes you read that correctly, my Grand Daughter is going to Baylor University. Yes she is only 9 years old but a Baylor student, all the same!

            After picking Gabi up, we stopped at a well-known fast food establishment, one of the nicer in this area, “Bushes Chicken”, as the kids needed nourishment, while Dave and I needed an ice tea. We then drove to the Ford Homestead, where I backed onto the drive as usual, allowing for a quick exit. This is an old habit from when I was a fireman.

            As we disembarked from the Ford’s Chevy there was a snap, craple and popping noise. Our attention was directed to a tall tree on the back 40. A limb was breaking as we exited the vehicle. It did not fall, it just hung there, over the location of where the pool should have been. See photo below.

            Have you ever had bad news that turned out to be good news? Well you should read on as this tale has two examples of news being both, good and bad.

            First consider this. My first wife bought a pool for the kids and encouraged me to install it. The pool had a leak in it, and I had to take it down, “Bad news”. The tree limb that broke was over the area where the pool should have been, since the pool was not there, the leak which was originally bad news is also, “good news”. (I know someone doesn’t understand, so think about it, if the pool was there the limb when it finally falls would have hit the pool, why do I have to explain everything!)

            The limb was very high near the top of a large tree. I had tried most of the day Saturday to find a way to get that limb down. I even put a four foot extension on my 16 foot pole saw (made it 20 foot and very hard to handle) I got on top of an eight foot step ladder and I still could not reach the broken part of the limb.

Later in the day when all hope seem to be gone, I asked for a little help from above. With this divine help, I was then able to get a rope with a weight on it up in the limb and twisted around a limb. I then, after much straining, was able to make the limb fall to earth. Photo below.

 

            Again, we have good news which is also bad news. The good news was that the limb fell to the ground and the bad news was the limb fell to the ground! 

            Earlier in the day I had hauled off a trailer load of limbs and now I am starting to fill the trailer again. As I was waiting in line to have the limbs removed from my trailer, I noticed what at first appeared to be some type of ancient writing on the million gallon water tank that I was parked next to. It is difficult to see in the photo below, you may see it better if you click on the photo.

As I viewed the drawing I realized it was not a drawing but cracks in the tank. I was hoping it did not give way while I was sitting there.

            What, you have a question. Ok, what is your question? Oh, I thought that was obvious! The question is, how was getting the limb down both good and bad news. Good news is I got it down, bad news I got it down and now I have to start rebuilding the pool, which is a lot of work for this retired senior citizen!

            Don’t retire, there is too much work to do.

May your news, always be good!

Don Ford