Everything is Bigger in Texas

I have today begun to believe the above statement. You are correct I have lived here for many years and I am now a naturalized citizen of Texas. Even though I have heard the statement, “Everything is bigger in Texas”, I had to see it to believe it.

               I guess the fact that I don’t usually believe something until I have seen it is a throwback from living in Missouri. As you may know, many Missourians habitually say, “you got to show me”, when something new is presented to them. That is where the comment “The Show me State” saying comes from.

               Back to my originals thought; “everything is bigger in Texas” became a true statement this morning as I was standing on my driveway sipping on a cup of hot coffee. As I surveyed the landscape (AKA my front yard) I noticed the Easter Bunny had already visited our home and had left some enormous colored Easter eggs.

It must have been a big chicken that laid these eggs and a very large Easter bunny that delivered the eggs.

For those of you that are very observant, you may have noticed the Bunny next to the eggs. That is a cement bunny and not the Easter bunny. The cement bunny is way too small to have delivered those eggs.

 

New subject; the neighbor did have a fellow come and mow her yard and it surprisingly looks very nice.

 

New subject: My wife of 43 years 11 months 23 days broke the washing machine last night. This is a major investment for “The Ford Homestead”. If you want to donate you may send your donations to, “The Ford Foundation for the Preservation of Don Ford”.           

The washer was only about 30 years old so I can’t understand why it would give up the ghost. I have been assigned the task of finding another washer. Can you believe that my present wife would allow me, to attempt to purchase a washer that she will use hopefully for the next 30 years?  My first stop this morning will be at Goodwill and if they don’t have a washer I may try the second hand store in East Waco.

 

That is all for now, I hope you have a safe and fun weekend.

 

Don Ford

 

 

Upset Neighbor.

               I think I have upset my neighbor by offering to mow her back yard. I am sure I did not approach her properly.  I was mowing my front yard when she pulled into her drive way. I stopped mowing and said to her, I will mow your back yard if you want”, to which she responded very quickly, “I have a fellow coming tomorrow”.

               I did not mean to upset my neighbor; the yard does need to be mowed in a bad way.

 

Last Sunday, I decided to purchase an item that I had been considering for a while.  I have been considering this tool and the Wal-Mart had one that seemed to be a fair price. It should be understood that being on a fixed income we will not be able to afford lunch at the Ford House for a couple weeks. Being on a fixed (aka restricted) income, we must make choices and sometimes the choice is between a new tool and food.

 

               This new tool is to be used in yard care so starving my first wife and me was the choice. We can consider the lack of food as fasting prior to Easter. If you remember I am an ordained minister (via the internet) and that kind of requires me to get ready for Easter.

 

               The new tool is a string trimmer. Yes I do have a string trimmer but it is big and gas powered. I have wanted a smaller unit that is electric powered. The unit is battery powered and it came with two batteries. I used it yesterday in the front yard and it worked as expected. It is not as powerful as the gas trimmer but it does a good job.

 

               Now the reason for this story is to explain that I am charging the batteries for the trimmer using solar power. The solar panel on the shed had charged my lawn battery and another battery during the winter months. I have plugged the battery into a timer and set the timer to charge the battery between 9:00am and 5:00pm.

 

               My constant companion “Tejas’, just informed me of a lawn mowing service at the neighbor’s home. I looked out and this fellow is knee deep in weeds trying to clear a path along the fence in the back yard.

 

I hope you have an outstanding day.

 

Don Ford           

 

 

Me complain?

               Yesterday my constant companion Tejas and I were taking a stroll through the yard. Tejas had noted that I should probably pick up all the small limbs that have blown out of our trees. Tejas knows I don’t like to run over debris with either of my mowers.

 

My constant companion noted, the neighbor to the south had improved their back yard with a major clean up and mowing, while the neighbor to the north has done nothing.

 

It seems as if Tejas and I have these discussions every spring. Obviously, the yard at “The Ford Homestead” is always immaculate. I am sure it has something to do with the retired person (me) that has been assigned yard maintenance. 

 

I have thought about offering my service as a, “lawn care professional” to the neighbor but I then think about the fact that it might become work.  Do I really want to work? What happens when I need my nap?

 

I hope it is warm enough to mow today or tomorrow because the weather person has predicted rain, starting Thursday through Easter Sunday. My idea of the correct temp for mowing is between 60 and 70 with no wind. I may have these ideal conditions a couple time per year, one in the spring and maybe one in the late fall.

 

I had to leave the computer for a few minutes and now I have returned. It seems we had a plumbing blockage and we did not own a plunger. Alex and I went to the hardware store (don’t tell anyone it was an Ace store, I went there because it was close) and purchased a “plumbers Helper” aka plunger. I can now say that the proper drainage has returned.

 

We will have Easter dinner here at “The Ford Homestead” this Sunday. My wife of 43 years11 months and 21 days had indicated she will prepare a brisket. The family will be here for the noon repast and probably a neighbor or two may visit later in the day.

 

I hope you have an excellent week and a nice Easter Sunday.

 

Don Ford  

 

 

I was thinking about words...

        I understand that it may be difficult to believe that I have the ability to think but occasionally I do. I am considering why some words don’t seem to follow the same rules.

Example;

·  Slow                Slower             Slowest           Slowly             Slowing

·  Fast                 Faster              Fastest             - - - - -              Fasting

 

Who decides how words are used?

Why isn’t “Fastly” a recognized word?
 

Why does the word slowing mean “to reduce speed”, while the word fasting mean, “to not eat for a period of time?”  

 

I hope you have the best day of your life today.

 

Don Ford

 

 

Northern Weather

        This was sent to me from a friend in northern Indiana. I do not have permission to post this so I have removed most of her comments.

 

It is snowing!   We have about 5 inches right now!  Let me tell you, it is absolutely beautiful this morning!   It is a thick snow, and the trees, well, everything, is gorgeous!  Actually wish I could be outside playing in it.

 

 

 

Have a great week!

 

               Mary

 

 

 

If you can't have fun don't do it.

               I have made that comment many times, often when someone thinks I am doing something silly.  Everyone should keep that statement in mind and have as much fun as possible. You should be able to enjoy what you are doing most of the time.  If you are not enjoying what you are doing, do something else.

 

               As I stood in my driveway this morning observing the world and drinking  a cup of java, I witnessed many noisy birds flying over. In all, it took about a minute for all the birds to get past. As I understand it that was a flock of birds flying over. Why do they all fly together in the same direction and make the same sounds? What are they saying as they go over? Do they save their poop until human or clean cars are below? Are they really a mob with the mob mentality? When they get to where they are going do they stay together?

 

               On a different subject; if I were writing a letter to a four legged white tail deer. Would I start the letter “My Dear Deer”?   It sounds a little repetitive bit but it seems to be correct.

 

               As I stood at the end of the drive way one of my neighbors was leaving for work. It was still dark enough to have the head lights on so I waved to her. I wonder what she was thinking about the retired man standing outside. Did the retired man's wife make him stand outside as a punishment? Possibly, the neighbor was happy that I was not in the street where I could be hit.

 

               As you can see I try to have fun and enjoy what I am doing.

 

I hope you have an outstanding weekend.

 

Don Ford

 

 

  

                        

                                                                                                                  

                  

 

This is the First.

               Yes, as you know, this is the first full day of spring. Have you ever wondered why they differentiate between the first day and the first full day of spring? I haven’t and I don’t want to consider the difference.

               We here at “The Ford Homestead” received ½ inch of rain as a gift of the first day of spring. Our yards needed the rain and it keeps me from needing to water.

               I have often wondered why my wife of 43 years 11 months and 17 days buys flowers and puts them in the yard expecting me to water them throughout the summer.  This may be her way of getting me out of my rocking chair.

               Our yellow rose turns white after a couple days.

 

Different subject:

Over the years I have learned to read people, even though many people do not believe I have the ability. We all subconsciously read people all the time but it is more useful and fun when we do it in a conscious mode.

You may not believe it but I have enjoyed arguing debating with people over the years. The trick is to not debate anyone that is upset with you. When the other person gets upset and loud you should become quite and cool headed. 

I believe they teach lawyers to stay cool and not become personally involved in an argument. This helps the lawyer to continue to think and consider options when the other person is upset and saying whatever comes into their mind.

It is difficult to stay cool and collected when you are personally involved in the argument; being aware that you are, “being drawn into the debate or argument” is essential.

As soon as you realize that you have become involved you must change the approach. Take a deep breath, look away, get composed and shut up. When it is your turn to talk keep the volume of your voice down, never try to talk over the other person. Raising your voice shows that you are upset excited or out of control. 

 

 Years ago there was a fellow that I had hired. This fellow did not like me almost from the beginning. He campaigned trying to get me fired, such as calling the home office and talking to other people in the building setting many of them against me.

He came into my office one day to complain about his last review. I was in a good mood but he was not. He started to complain and his voice became loud. 

I was deliberately staying quiet and not participating in the one sided argument. I intentionally smiled at him as he became more disturbed and loud. After about 5 minutes he stopped and just looked at me. He asked if I was listening to him. I could hear him but I was not allowing anything he said to upset me and I knew “I was in control”. 

At that point I asked if he wanted to discuss the matter calmly and quietly. He got up and walked out of the office. This person self-terminated a couple months later. 

There is a lot more to this story but that is for another time.

 

Story telling time is over; I hope you have a good week.

 

Don Ford

 

 

It is Over; This is The Last One; The End.

            It is said, “All good things must come to an end”, and today is the end.

 

            There are those of you that would say, “It was not a good thing” and you would be as right as me saying, “It was a good thing”.

 

            I saw it, for the most part as enjoyable and a pleasant experience for me. I understand now that some if not most of you considered it painful, boring and too long.

 

            I would have liked it if those of you who have read my blog posting could have been more accepting.  I know some of you consider it to have been the same thing repeated over and over.

 

     More variety could have been both good and bad. Not knowing what to expect each week or becoming use to one thing and then the total opposite follows, both can be frustrating. 

 

            I will leave you with an appropriate photo of buzzards circling over my house, possibly signifying the end.

            Like it or not, today is the last day of winter, tomorrow is the start of spring.

 

I hope you have a good day and a nice spring!

 

Don Ford

 

                 

 

Ford; Model "A" or Model "T"

               Actually, we here at “The Ford Homestead” have made a choice.

               The weekend was kind of quite at “The Ford Homestead”. The grandkids went to their Nana’s home in Dallas for fun and relaxation. I worked in the yard some and took the “appropriate number of naps”.

               About 50% of my time outside was trying to keep an eye on Molly. This cat is a pain in the neck. When we had her at the vets office he stated, “We all liked Molly, she is a keeper”. It might have been a good idea to let the vet keep her.

               Before anyone opens a door they have to look around to see where Molly is. She is very good at running out as soon as a door is opened. Once outside she has to investigate everything. She has tried to sneak up on a bird but has not mastered the process yet. The neighbors dogs keep us informed of her whereabouts when she is in the back yard.  (I think that is the first time I have ever written the word “whereabouts”.  I am not sure whether it is good to enjoy these new experiences, but at my age you take what you can.)

               We at “The Ford Homestead” have decided on Model “T” Ford. This is a slight variation of our cat’s name, Molly Ford. It started as “Molly you are trouble” then evolved into “Molly “T” Ford” and then the natural evolution to “Model “T” Ford” which means; Molly you are always Trouble at the Ford House.

 

Have an outstanding week.

 

Don Ford

 

 

 

Rattle Head Copper Moccasin

               Yes there is a new hybrid poisons snake which I have identified and named, “Rattle Head Copper Moccasin”. This extremely aggressive snake was discovered at the Ford Homestead in Hewitt, Texas as I was preparing to work in the yard. In the photo we see a young “Rattle Head Copper Moccasin” which is about 12 inches long. This reptile could grow to 4 feet in length.

It could be a grass snake.

The work I needed to do is to mow the jasmine and remove the red mulch after which I would like to loosen the bare dirt to accommodate spread and growth of the jasmine.

Below we can see the mowed jasmine to about 4 inches. 

I found numerous acorns on the ground around the roots of the plants. These acorns are very difficult to get out due to the vines making it almost impossible to use a rake.

 

I have discovered two new tools in the process of cleaning up the yard. Being a senior citizen I attempt to use as little energy as possible when working in the yard or anywhere else. The trash can lying on its side is very helpful (the flat sided trash can is retired from kitchen duty).              

After raking or sweeping leaves or other debris into a pile, place a trash can flat side down near the pile. Using a broom or other tool you can push the debris into the open container. This keeps the senior (me) from needing to bend over as many times.

 

The second tool that a wise senior can use is, “The Grandchild”. I have noticed that Alex will help me with any yard work but if his sister is present (this week is spring break and she is home) the amount of work produced by him is greatly reduced.

 

After picking up the leaves, red mulch and acorns I mowed the front yard. Even though we received 1.5 inches of rain last week the ground is very dry so I had to water.

Am I done? Know way, but I am taking today off (the Lord rested on the Sabbath, [seventh day] so I am resting on the fourth day).

I hope you have nice week.

 

Don Ford

 

 

Pretty, Handsome and Me

 

Below you will see a couple photos taken at “The Ford Homestead of Hewitt”.  It was western day at Gabi’s school so she wore her hat. Alex, not wanting to be left out, also put his hat on and joined Gabi in the photo opp.

I also felt the need to be immortalized in a photo, so I put my summer hat on and posed too.

 

 

It is easy to see that they get their good looks from there grandpa.

 

From the western White House Ford Homestead, Have a good day.

 

Don Ford

 

 

                                                                                                                  

                  

 

I have noticed changes.

 

               If you have been reading my posts you will know that I am and ordained minister.

     Before that one persona asks how I became an ordained minister I will go over the process again. I went on line and became an ordained minister in the “UNIVERSAL LIFE CHURCH MONASTERY”.   I was going to purchase an ID card and a certificate but I noticed it was not a secured web site and decided to pass.

     Below is a photo taken of me; when I view the photo I noticed the crosses in the back ground. Now you know this was not a planned photo and the crosses just happened to be there. I am sure it is a sign. Maybe it has to do with Easter.

    The Reverend Don Ford                    Another cross appeared!

 

 

      Today I installed a dead bolt on the front door. I got is on sale and thought that I would install it. I had to drill holes in the door and then “try” to get them to match up. If you have the holes in the door it is an easy job but if you have to drill and cut the door it may be advisable to hire someone to do it.

 

               Remember to set the clocks forward this Saturday night for that “good old daylight saving time”.

 

From the time saving mind of       Don Ford

All rights reserved; any reproduction or distribution without written permission is strictly prohibited.

 

 

 

                 

 

Who needs a body guard?

 

            Yesterday was a good day, Alex and I went to the park playground for some exercise for him. We did have a frosty from Wendy’s fine food restaurant; we both got a nap in the afternoon.

            The Wendy’s experience is the subject of this posting.  For some reason Alex enjoys going inside and eating when I prefer the drive through. Alex won so we parked and went inside.

            I should note that many times when Alex and I are out and about, someone will refer to Alex as my partner or buddy and I explain that he is my body guard.

            We enjoyed our frosty and decided to head for home. To get to the pickup truck we walked on the side walk along the driveway and then needed to cross the drive. We always say "let’s look both ways to see if there are any cars coming". Today there was a car followed by a pickup truck approaching. The car stopped and signaled for Alex and I to cross. I said lets go the car has stopped. Alex had been holding on to one of my fingers grabbed my hand with both of his hands and pull back away from the drive saying no. He would not cross in front of the stopped vehicle. We stepped back from the curb and I signaled for them to drive past us.  The lady driving the car pulled up to us and said, “he has been trained well”. Now when I say Alex is my body guard it become a true statement.

 

From the well-guarded mind of         Don Ford

All rights reserved, any reproduction or distribution without written permission is strictly prohibited.

 

                 

 

Trailer loading Physiology

               Yes, there is a physiology of trailer loading and I will be your guide through the process.

 

               First, what important event happened on this date 2010?

It was the birth of my grandson Alex.

He and I plan to celebrate by going to the park playground and then visiting a fast food establishment for burgers and fries. The formal events (gifts and cake) will be this evening when his parents get home from work.

 

      Now back to trailer loading process as presented by me.

      Some of you may think that my expertise in trailer loading came from my years working in the distribution centers. To be truthful, I did learn a few tricks to the process from distribution.

 

      Often the art of trailer loading is passed down from father to son. It might be compared to learning how to ride a bike. Often dad will put his son on the new bike and walk along holding on to the bike while the son learns to balance. Loading a trailer could be seen in a similar light; the father forcing requiring his son to help load a trailer before playing with friends.

 

      That is not how it happened to me. Our family was too poor to own a trailer. I have developed my own techniques for trailer loading and it is often based on the unloading process. What I am saying is; as I load the trailer I think about how difficult it will be to unload and I try to make it easy. When I haul limbs to the dump there are city workers there that unload the trailer and I attempt to load for easy unloading. There is a loading technique that I use which allows the person unloading to pull the entire load off. That will not be seen in the photo today.

 

      By the way my dad did not walk beside me holding the bike while I learned how to ride my first bike. I had a big brother and kids in the neighborhood who knew how to ride and I learned from them before the purchase of my first bike. Also, in our neighborhood none of the kids were selling or using drugs and although we were shooting each other a lot while playing cowboys we were not using real guns. Things have changed.

 

               Below I have placed a photo of the trailer which has been loaded and ready to go. The thought process in this loading was to load the heavy logs on the floor of the trailer balancing the load over the wheels so the front or rear is not too heavy. Then I loaded the smaller limbs on top.

I am sure one of you will see the blue tape on the trailer side rails and assume the tape is there to help in the loading process. We all know what happens when we “ass/u/me”, the tape is there for a different purpose.

 

You are correct, that is a lot of work for a retired person.

 

It is supposed to get to 85 degrees this afternoon with lots of March winds.

 

From the trailer loading mind of Don Ford

All rights reserved; any reproduction or distribution without written permission is strictly prohibited.

 

 

 

Treeologist

               As usual, I should begin by defining a term that may be unfamiliar to some of my readers. A Treeologist is a person that has studied and understands trees, along with proper wood butchering techniques. I am considered the premiere Treeologist of Hewitt, Texas.

 

A little history for non-Texans; Today is Texas Independence Day. 177 years ago today (Feb 2^nd) Texas declared its independence from Mexico.

 

               Back to my original thought;

Today started out too cold for a retired person to be outside so I found things to do inside. I was trying to understand how to install a dead bolt to our front door. I reviewed the device and decided that I could install it properly. Then I looked at the door knob set that came with it. It is defective and will not work properly. The door knob will lock on the outside but not inside. I bought the set at an employee sale, “as is”, and it is defective. Some time you win and sometimes you don’t.

 

             About noon I decided to have lunch so not being a cook I open a can of soup.  I am able to fix soup but not much else. My wife of 43 years was going to garage sales and did not have time to prepare my noon repast.

 

            After eating my soup (no sandwich) I decided to check to see if it had warmed up. It was warmer but not real comfortable. The wind was making it feel colder than the actual temperature. I bundled up and went into the back yard to survey the tree. Below is the subject of today’s posting and you can see my new adjustable ladder.

               This particular tree will have all its limbs cut off about 8 feet above the ground and the plan is to make a tree house on the stubs of the limbs. Old retired people need projects to keep them alert and handsome, and Gabi and Alex are asking for a tree house so…

             Above we see the limbs are cut and on the ground.

               I was cutting the limbs using a chain saw after they were on the ground, I broke the chain. Luckily, I had a new chain in the saw case. I went to the shed to do some repair work and decided I should clean the saw as I was repairing it. Cleaning and repair work took about an hour and I was just about to get out of the mood to butcher limbs, but I had to see if the new chain would cut. It worked as expected.

 

               I decided I was tired; I returned all the equipment to the shed and went to the house for a shower and a nap. Both were better than I had anticipated.

 

               I will finish cutting and stacking the wood tomorrow, maybe.

 

From the Treeologist mind of       Don Ford

 

All rights reserved; any reproduction or distribution without written permission is strictly prohibited.