Second day of Kindergarten...

            I was elected to take the young heiress of The Ford Homestead Foundation to her second day of school.

               The traffic wasn’t too bad getting to the grade school, we parked and I explained that I would walk with her to her class.  She quickly said no.  It was obvious that she did not want her grandpa to be seen walking her into the school. I did walk with her to the front door and she walked in by herself. I stayed and watch as she walked down the long hall and turned the corner to the Gym. I asked one of the ladies who work there if she had gone to the right place.

               I left the school a rejected grandpa. I needed to go out to the DIB center so I headed for Panther Way. At the intersection of Panther Way and Hewitt Drive I sat while the traffic light changed 3 times before I was close enough to get through on a green light. I then drove by the Old High School now a junior high and the traffic was even worse. Rush hour in Dallas isn’t as bad as the school traffic in Hewitt.

               I made it to DIB and completed my business. I was talking with Vicki about the special loads they were going to be taking to Louisiana and Mississippi. The hurricane is bad for people but good for business.  I asked for Vicki’s advice; should I get burritos on the way home or not. She reassured me that getting the burritos would be the right thing to do. I did.

               Donna cleans the house on Thursday so Alex and I needed to find a reason to be outside. Alex suggested we could wash the motorcycle. I agreed and we got the hose, bucket, soap and cleaning rags. Alex did the lower work and I took the high work.  Alex is really a big help but when I started drying the bike he was continuing to put soapy water on the bike.  We discussed what need to be done so Alex decided to wash Donna’s vehicle.

               The bike is clean and ready to ride.  I need to get a shower so I can go to pick up a prescription and a star bucks coffee. Star Bucks is kind of like road kill as I have to drive there to get it.

 

From the clean mind of   Don Ford

 

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First day of Kindergarten...

               I was not fortunate enough to go to Kindergarten.  Back in the olden days if they had kindergarten it was optional.  I started the first grade at age 5.

               Gabi was up and dressed waiting for her ride to school. She asked me if I thought she was cute.  I said “you are cute and pretty both”.

Now that you see the above photo I am sure you agree she is cute.

 

From the proud grandpa mind of                Don Ford

 

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              Don Ford

Lesson Learned?

            My granddaughter who is five and a half taught me a lesson.

 

               You may not be able to teach an old dog new tricks but I believe you can teach an old man new tricks (or at least make him realize he is acting like an idiot). 

I was breaking the rule of never having a big ole cold glass of milk on your desk. Eating is ok but beverages on your desk can cause real problems.

               A few years ago I was using a lap top when I spilled an entire glass of milk on the machine. The screen went dead immediately and I started using all the choice words that I knew. I was smart enough to quickly turn the lap top over so the milk could drain out the way it went in, through the key board. The worst part about this experience, the computer was my personal PC and not the companies.

               Knowing the above I should not have had the drink on the desk. I had finished eating; Gabi was standing next to me with a toy. I reached with my left hand to get the glass of milk and as you have already guessed, I knocked it over. There was this puddle of milk running under the desk organizer heading for the back of the desk. The stack of papers on the desk was waiting to be shredded. I did not use any bad language but I did hit my fist on the desk very hard and said something like, “THAT’S JUST GREAT”.

               I am sure it is difficult for you to believe that I would get upset over any situation especially spilt milk.             I had a small towel that I keep next to the coffee pot which is on my desk (again a possible disaster waiting to happen). I began taking things off the desk and wiping up the milk. Donna brought me an additional towel which allowed me to stop the flow.

               I did not see what Gabi was doing during my outrageous behavior but Donna told me later that she had her hands over her ears.

               With the milk under control I looked over at Gabi.  She looked at me with those big eyes wide open and calmly said, “Grandpa take a deep breath”.  I immediately know how stupid I had been; I took the deep breath.  Gabi went on to say, “Just calm down grandpa, everything is ok”.   Gabi had put me in my place by showing me that I acted like a fool and at the same time made me proud that she was my granddaughter. 

 

From the foolish but proud mind of                          Don Ford

 

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Solar Panel Install

               This is an update from the “Free Electric” posting.

 

               If you will view the photos you should be able to see my progress in the solar panel install on, “The Ford Homestead Shed”. 

Below there is a board attached to the shed and on the board are hooks. These hooks allow me to hang the solar panel and allow it to move from vertical to approximately a 30 degree angle.

 

In this photo we see the frame that the solar panels attach too. It is in the vertical position

The next photo shows the frame at an angle, there are two legs that hold it in this position. When collecting solar energy the panel would be in this position.

In the last photo the panel is installed. Do not look at the wires at the top of the panel and where they go through the wall inside the shed. I said “Don’t look” but you looked anyway!

You never listen.

               I have started installing the inside equipment but have not finished. As I worked in the shed yesterday I had a fan blowing air from the outside into the shed using the solar power. Even though there was plenty of air movement the shed was still hot.

 

From the electrified mind of                        Don Ford

 

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A Cash Crop

            Cash crops mean extra money and for those of us on a fixed income extra money is a real blessing.

 

               I heard an unusual noise in the back yard and the grandkids were playing there, so I decided to check it out. The grand kids were having a good time and not aware of the noise.

               This noise was coming from the tree top. As I walked into the back yard I was first greeted by our trusted guard dog Tejas.  As I took a few steps into the yard two birds flew from the tree top. One was a large hawk and the other was a blue jay.

               The hawk makes a screeching sound and the blue jay makes an obnoxious sound but when you put them both together it is one bad racket.

The blue jay was harassing the hawk. It is not unusual to see small birds harassing the hawks. The hawk could and would kill and eat the smaller bird but the smaller bird can out maneuver the hawk.

Back to my original thought;

Cash crops vary and some are worth more than others. Our neighbor has a garden with tomatoes and squash. These are good to eat but if you want to sell them to the neighbors for cash, you will not be successful.

Pecans on the other hand sell rather quickly on the open market. In the photo below you see just a few of the outstanding and may I say large soft shell pecans on out tree.  I have been very watchful for squirrels this year and I intend to see that they leave our neighborhood without a single pecan.

There are other cash crops that will bring more money, notably cannabis has a tendency to provide a larger return on investment.  There are other names for the cannabis plant such as grass or weed. I do not understand why it is called weed or grass; my 5 plants which are about 6 foot tall now, don’t look anything like grass.

My wife suggested using one of the cannabis plants in the house with Christmas ornaments in December.  I don’t like that idea as the lights might dry the plant out and then it could go up in smoke.

 

(I am sure the last statement may have been too subtle for a couple of my readers so if you don’t get the joke send me an email and I will explain it.)

 

From the drug free mind of                          Don Ford

 

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What kind of pie? Mud Pie

            Yes this mud pie does look appetizing, but it is not one of my creations.

               The photo shows a mud pie made by my granddaughter and although it may look similar to what I made for supper two nights ago it is not my creation.

               This wonderful looking pie started me thinking about what I might want to prepare for our evening repast.

               I have learned that having a neat well groomed yard restricts the ingredients available for my soup and salad supper. I don’t like to do it but I sneak into my neighbor’s yards to collect various ingredients.  I can get the freshly mowed grass from my yard, which I use in both my soup and salad. I get the dandelions come from the neighbor three houses down. Most of the people in the neighborhood work during the day so it is not too difficult to pick the necessary greens from many yards. From the ditch behind our house I am able to pick some wild garlic.

               A main ingredient for the soup is grubs and these I have to dig up. Grubs are very delicious when boiled or grilled and have a lot of proteins.

To add some spicy heat to the soup we add one and a half cups of fire ants.  These spicy little creatures have a jalapeno flavor. They are not difficult to find but can be a “real pain” when collecting them from the ant bed. 

Leaves from the pecan tree are very tasty and have a nice crunch. They are used in both the salad and the soup. I have tried the oak leaves but they are somewhat bitter and don’t have a crunch. 

You can use crushed acorns in the soup which add a little color.  We crush the acorns by placing them in the street and as the cars drive over them they get crushed. The problem with this method is the darn squirrels will try to steal the crushed acorns.

For the desert we take a nine inch pie pan and place clean mud in it. Clean is defines as having no sand. Mix in a lot of ground blooms from a honeysuckle to provide some sweetness. To make the mud pie more appealing to the eye, top the pie with yellow or pink rose buds.

No road kill was used in the above soup and salad; the grand kids are allowed to help in the kitchen.

From the fixed income mind of    Don Ford 

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It rained, Prayer answered

Well I don’t think the nude rain dance in my back yard was the catalyst for the recent rain but I am sure most of the neighbors enjoyed the dancing.

               On Saturday August 19^th, it rained on Hewitt Texas.  The rains were more than the weather people were predicting.  The rain started sometime in the night and continued into the day. My rain gage had 1.50 inches of water when the rain finally subsided.

               This morning as usual, I put the coffee on and made a bowl of creel. I went into the garage and open the garage door then I got Tejas’ morning food. It was unusually cool for August and Tejas noticed that is was cloudy. We went back inside; I turned the TV and computer on. It wasn’t more than a minute later when Alex came in wanting to know where Gran was. Gran is short for Grandma.  I suggested that she may have gone out front to get the newspaper. Alex turned and ran for the front door. A minute or so later both Alex and Gran came in noting that it is raining.  I was surprised saying, I was just outside and it wasn’t raining.

               Rain in Hewitt, TX is now a spectator sport. Gran, Alex and I went out into the garage positioned our chairs up next to open overhead door and watched it rain. We all had our drinks (coffee, tea, a smoothie) as we watched the rain drops fall. Tejas went out an lay in the yard allowing the soft rain to cover his coat.

               Changing the subject:

The photo was taken yesterday as Tejas was eating his morning food. Alex was inspecting the process. Years ago when Gabi first came on the scene, Tejas and I had a serious discussion about the grand kids. We decided that Tejas would never growl at the kids and he would be their playmate and protector.  He has never shown any anger at the grand kids even allowing them to remove a ball from his food bowl while he was eating.

               One last comment about the weather; it was unusually cool yesterday and last night. It is not supposed to be cool in Texas in August. It is kind of like being in a northern state.

From the cool mind of     Don Ford

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Electric from the sun...

Solar panels give you electric from the sun, but it isn’t free…

               Below is a solar panel, it is in my yard. It does in fact provide electricity from sun light. As you can see there are three panels mounted side by side, each panel produces 15 watts for a total of 45 watts. I plan to use this panel to charge a battery/s.  With a power inverter I can then         

Convert battery power into 120 volts which can power regular house type appliances. I have run a couple fans on the sun power and later the vacuum cleaner.

               A few years back when I was into Amateur radio (aka Ham Radio) I was also into amateur TV.  Yep, Hams do a lot of different types of communication. Here in Waco there were several amateurs who transmitted TV signals. We would get on at various times and basically one operator would transmit video and audio while others would watch.  Then another would transmit and so on.  I still have the equipment but it is in storage.

Ham radio is not an inexpensive hobby.  I kept track for the first couple years of everything I purchased. I stopped tracking at $5,000.00.  I had a job then and was not on a fixed income.  

There was a fellow that I talked to via radio (20 meter) in California who bragged about having a solar powered Ham Radio station. He said all his radio equipment was powered by batteries that were charged by solar panels.  He also explained that all his radio equipment was mounted on a work bench and the bench was on casters. His reason for this was “earth quakes”. He explained that when the quake shook the house the bench would just roll around and the equipment did not fall off.

               What, you have a question? As always I will be happy to enlighten you. It is part of the challenge/responsibility of having a blog, which I voluntarily accept.

Yes I have a call sign it is “KJ5OD”.

Free electricity is not close to being true.  The solar panel must be purchased, a power inverter, and a battery.

               I would like to have the panel be somewhat portable and I am planning on mounting the panel on the side of the shed.

               It is a project that should keep me busy for a few days; ok I work slow so it may take a month or more.

From the electrified mind of                        Don Ford

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Don't Know, Don't Care

                        Today’s youth just don’t understand …

               The morning started out as usual, I had made my coffee and bowl of cereal, I was sitting at my favorite computer ready to greet the on slot of new email.

               Actually most of the email I receive is advertisements and other spam. That word, “spam” brings up another subject; why would the computer world use a word that describes a delicious meal, a meal that many of us retired people who have a fixed income have learned to love. Span is the state meal of Hawaii. 

I want to suggest that everyone refer to junk email as Baloney.

               Before you ask, yes I do have two computers. The first is this computer I use most often located in what use to be my office. The second is by my chair in the front room which was a gift from the company I use work for.  They decided that if they gave me something, I might be talked into leaving.  I guess it worked.

That brings up another subject.  When I retired from DIB they gave me a certificate which was worth $10.00 for each year I had worked.  My certificate was worth $400.00 which was very nice (40 X $10.00 = $400.00). The certificate is for purchase at DIB.  I purchased a walk behind mower.

               Shortly after I left they increased the amount from $10.00 per year to $50.00 per year. Now if a person retires with 40 years of service they would receive a $2,000.00 certificate. If I had received the new amount I would have purchased a nice riding mower. Old retired people need riding mowers.

Another way to look at this; if a person works there 8 years and retires they would get the same amount as I received. The $50.00 per year amount is a nice increase and helps the newly retired person who is probably on a fixed income, make the jump into retirement. 

Back to this morning’s events; Gabi and Alex were going into the back yard to play so I asked Gabi, “What are you going to play”. She didn’t know so I suggested cowboys.  I said, “You can act like you are robbing a stagecoach”. 

Gabi had an odd expression and asked, “What’s a stagecoach”.  I guess kids now days don’t get to see the old time cowboy movies.

How can kids have any fun without shooting each other with a stick gun?

Think about it for a moment; those old cowboy shows must have had too much violence in them for kids. The cowboy would get shot and fall down but there was never any blood or guts. Most TV shows now days are more violent and show the blood, guts and brains of the victims. 

Gabi and Alex ended up playing a non-violent version of roadrunner and the coyote.

From the old time cowboy mind of                           Don Ford 

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Good night Hug and Kiss

Good night Hug and Kiss

What is the acceptable procedure and proper order for giving good night hugs?

            At “The Ford Homestead”, Granny does a lot for the grandkids including taking them to town and purchasing toys. Naturally you would assume that Granny would get the first goodnight hug and kiss and only after that Papa might get a hug or occasional kiss.

            Last night at the appropriate time for the kids to head off to bed Gabi followed the normal process of Granny first and then grandpa.  All was well and then Alex started to make his round.

            Alex first came to papa (that is what he calls me) and gave me a kiss and then came right back for the hug. It should have then been Granny’s turn next, but there was a major breach in protocol.

Alex went to Tejas and gave him a hug and then a kiss on the nose.  Yes directly on the wet dog nose.  Alex then proceeded to Granny for her hug and wet kiss.

I guess granny now understands where she ranks in the “good night hug and kiss hierarchy. 

From the first hug mind of     Don Ford

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This is the 100th posting

            It has been 6 months since I started posting articles on the blog and I have enjoyed the process.

               Alex and I have established a morning ritual of going out the door with his mom as she is going to work and then we sit in our chairs, me drinking my coffee and Alex has a yogurt smoothie. I haven’t tasted the smoothie but they smell odd.

This morning Alex and I were sitting in the chairs on the drive way near the garage door discussing why his mom and dad had to go to work. Tejas our amigo came up to put his two cents worth in remarking, if mom and dad did not work, Alex could not have all those nice toys. I tried to keep toys out of the conversation but you know how Tejas is, always thinking about fun and playing.              

               Alex asked what I was going to write about in my 100^th posting.  I did not have a good answer so I decided to write about grasshoppers.

               You are correct, grasshoppers have nothing to do with the 100^th article but they do have something to do with riding motorcycles. 

               Sunday morning I decided to go for a short ride trying to have a little fun and returning home before it got to hot. I only rode for about an hour and a half before it began to get too hot.

               As I was riding on a nice stretch of highway this big fat grasshopper hit the center of my windshield, let’s call him “Dead Fred”.

As you can imagine Dead Fred made a big splash on the windshield.  There were wings, eye balls and yellow juice all over the center of my clean windshield. 

Yes, I had cleaned the windshield before I left the house and now it was soiled with the remains of once happy and free Dead Fred the grasshopper.

               As I looked through the windshield with Dead Fred’s remains, a thought came to mind; “I bet he doesn’t have the guts to do that again”.            

What, you don’t see the joke in that quote?  He doesn’t have the guts because they are spread on the windshield.

Some people just don’t have a sense of humor.  

Another comment about grasshoppers; have you ever been hit in the shin with a full grown grasshopper at 70 mph.  Well, I am here to tell you I have and it doesn’t feel good. It is kind of like being hit with a rock in the shin except a rock doesn’t usually leave guts on your pant leg.

Speaking of flying insects; there was another time when I was riding with some other bikers (we like to call ourselves bikers, it makes us feel important and mean) and there was a swarm of bees flying across the road.  I could see riders in front of me doing odd things when someone said, “Bees”, on the CB radio.  I ducked in behind the windshield and splattered several bees but did not get stung. I was glad I had my CB on.

Changing the subject, I tried to get a photo of that little rabbit that hangs out in our back yard driving Tejas crazy.  As I was watering yesterday evening late, the rabbit came out of the brush pile in the neighbor’s yard and sat there watching me water the plant. Now that I think of it he may have wanted a drink.

I tried to get a photo with the camera in my cell phone but it was too dark.  If I would not have washed the supper dishes (I volunteered and was not forced to wash them this time) I would have been outside earlier and there would have been more light and I could have shown you a photo of the little guy. 

Noticed I use the word “if”.  My mom would reply to us kids when we would use if in a comment, “if the dog wouldn’t have stopped to pee, he would have caught the rabbit”.

On another subject, I would like to thank everyone who sent donations to “The Ford Homestead Foundation, earmarked for Don’s birthday”. These donations will help in so many ways providing me with a well-deserved birth day present.  Today I am officially old.

I hope you have enjoyed at least a few of the articles; I have enjoyed putting them together.

Thank You

For the 100^th time and from an unusual mind of    Don Ford 

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Neighborhood Stores

Talking about the olden days, there were small mom and pop grocery stores in many neighborhoods.

I started thinking about the olden days and different neighborhoods that we have lived in. As I wondered through my olden day thoughts, it dawned on me that there was a store in most neighborhoods where I have lived.

These small family owned stores had the basic items that one would need. In most instances the owner would live in a small house at the back of the store. The store and house were one unit.

I had an aunt and uncle that owned a little neighborhood store. Hilderman’s Grocery (I hope I Spelled it correctly) was the name and although it had nothing to do with the name of the store, the store was located at the bottom of a hill. They were on the corner of Ranney Ave. and Hackberry St.  I went to Google Maps to look up the street name and the building that was the store/home is gone. There is some type of garage looking building there now.

These little neighborhood stores were the predecessor to modern day quick shops.

In the olden days (when I was a kid in the 50s) if your mother needed something she could tell you to get on the bike and go to the store.

In those days you did not have to watch your kid all the time; everyone knew everyone and other adults would tell on you if you did something wrong.

Most of these store sold items on credit.  If they knew the family you could get your items without paying.  They would write the items down on your “bill” and they knew that on payday someone would come in and pay your bill. 

These neighborhood stores were not where we bought all our groceries. There were larger stores that had more variety and better prices. They were not chain stores of today, just a larger version of the neighborhood store.

On another subject, Tejas was eating and Alex was lying on the floor beside him, not more than a foot away from the food bowl. I reached for the camera to get a photo and they were on the move.

Well, I was able to get a photo of the better side of both Alex and Tejas.

From the backside of                      Don Ford

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If everyone were truly equal...

            This is a depressing view of a world were all is truly equal.

                    Stop reading now and you will have a nice day.

               If everyone were truly equal and if there were no conflict in the world I believe the human race would not exist.

               Imagine if you will, you have what I have and I have what you have, if no one was wealthy, if no one was poor, if someone wasn’t trying to get more than you, then what would be the reason for living.

               There would be no reason to work since you could not have more or less than I do. Your home would be like mine, my furnishing would be like yours.

               If everyone truly loved each other there would be no envy, no jealousy.

Everyone would be proud of the same things. Your kids would be as smart as mine but not smarter. No one would get a scholarship for academic achievement because they would be equal in intelligence. 

There would be no football or other sports because one team would be equal to another.  If a game were played the score would be 0 to 0 because one team is equal to the other (they don’t keep score now in young kids sports, they are promoting this political view).

               Human kind needs challenges and opportunities to keep them focused and alive.

From the political science mind of                             Don Ford

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Shooting match, Missouri style

            Years ago in a land far away, I attended shooting matches and as I understand it they still have these shooting matches.

               The title, “shooting match” should cause one to think of accurate shooting, possibly hitting a bull’s eye on a target.  Well that is not the case in these Missouri shooting matches.

These shooting matches were always held at a bar in the country. 

The guns used were 12 gage shot guns.

The person holding the shooting match provided the shot gun shells, #9 bird shot.

The targets were 6 x 6 inch piece of soft white pine.

The distance from the shooter to the target about 75 feet.

The shooters would arrive and pick their boards. Many people named their boards but all boards had the name of the shooter on the back side.

The targets were put on the boards by the shooter, usually using a very sharp knife or razor blade. The shooter would cut as many “X” in the board as he wants. Each X on the board cost the shooter from 50 cents to $1.00 per X.  They would draw a circle around each X for easy identification. 

You pay for your boards and then go sit in the bar until it was your time to shoot. The bars made a lot of money from the shooters sitting around talking, drinking and eating hamburger while they wait for their turn to shoot.

As you know when a shot gun is fired there are small pellets shot out of the barrel. If you shoot a shot gun at a sheet of corrugated the shot when it hits forms a pattern. Most of the shot guns were modified to shoot a tighter pattern. The diameter of the barrel was made smaller at the end which would cause a tighter pattern and more shot impacting the pine board. 

I used an old Long Tom single shot gun that had a 36 inch barrel; it belonged to my brother Carl. This old gun did usually shoot a good pattern. 

There was a bench to sit on and a table to rest the gun on for a steady shot. Two shooters sit side by side and each shooter gets 2 shells. The fellow that hands out the shells would call out “ready” so everyone knew shots were going to be fired. After both had shot their two shells the fellow would call out, “they are up”, meaning the target boy could take down the boards and put two more up.

The judges had magnifying glasses to judge who had a shot that was close to the X’s that were cut on the boards. If you cut a center (shot hit the X) then your board was held until someone got closer to the X. 

They usually had 6 to 10 prizes and the prizes were usually meat such as a hind quarter of beef or half a hog.

As you can see it was really more of a game of chance than skill. No one knows where the shot will hit. 

Have you ever been in a bar where everyone had at least one gun and some were drinking beer?  I don’t know of anyone ever being hurt at one of the “shooting matches”.

From the matchless mind of                        Don Ford

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Giving me the look. 

Dozer as in Bulldozer

            One of my grandson’s nick names is Dozer…

               Alex has several nick names, all attached to him by family and friends. One of his nick names is, “The Bear Hunter”. This was attached to him by a friend.

               His mom and dad gave him the name of, “Dozer” when he was very little. It seems as if he did not let much get in his way.  If he wanted something he would just push things out of the way like a bulldozer. It was amazing how strong and determined he was and is when he is trying to get to something he wants.

               Being a Ford, they might have given him the nick name of, “bulldozer” as he seems to have some of the bull headedness or possibly hard headedness of the Ford Clan.

I know it is hard to believe that anyone with Irish blood or anyone related to me would be hard headed but…                          

It is possible he gets that trait from his mother’s side of the family, they are from Missouri…

This morning as Alex, Gabi and I were outside enjoying our coffee I observed another “Dozer” in the group.  No it wasn’t Gabi.  Tejas is more than a little jealous and as I was talking to Alex Tejas pushed his way in between Alex and me almost knocking Alex down. That is what started me thinking about the nick name dozer.

Tejas is jealous but he is not mean to the kids in any way. Later this morning while I was sitting here at my desk Tejas decided to eat from his bowl which is a few feet behind me. Alex sat down on the floor about a foot away from the bowl to observe. Tejas continues eating while Alex watched. Tejas, trying to conserve energy, lay down and continued to eat. Alex, bored with the eating process, got up and climbed across Tejas without Tejas seeming to know he was there.

From the bulldozer mind of                          Don Ford

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Promises

As you can see, I was promised rain but it has not yet occurred. I have prayed for rain and I am now resorting to nude rain dances in the back yard.

Our neighbors are not complaining about the nude dances (they all need the rain as bad as we do) but have asked that I play the drums a little quieter.  I have videos of the nude rain dance and you may receive a copy by donating $25.00 to “The Ford Homestead Foundation”.  Ask for offer XXX-397 (please allow two weeks for delivery). 

               Cactus should be considered a natural occurring hazardous material. We have had some Texas cactus on the north end of the house for years.  Many years ago it was placed there by us. We did not think that it would be a problem in that out of the way location. Well, over the years this hazard plant has spread and become a real problem. Alex got too close to this hazardous plant and had some stickers in his leg.  At a later date I ended up with stickers in my hand and I did not touch the plant.

               How did you get the stickers in your hand, if you did not touch the plant, he asked, with a confused look on his face. I will tell you, now that you asked. I was watering the plants that grow near the cactus when my rubber hose touched the plant. Many small stickers were embedded into the hose without my knowledge.  When I say small I mean extra small. To see these sticker you need a magnifying glass.

               Being the professional “waterologist” (a person who has extensively studied watering plants) I was able to complete the water process even though I had numerous stickers in my hand. The pain from these stickers was, “excruciating” (that means it hurt a lot).

I proceeded inside the house hoping for some pity and possibly help in removing the stickers. My wife attempted to help but I was soon aware that she was unable to be near her loving husband while he was so bravely enduring this horrendous pain.  I was alone with a tweezers and a magnifying glass. Try holding a magnifying glass and a tweezers in the same hand while attempting to remove hazardous stickers. It doesn’t work. I barrowed a magnifying glass that was mounted on a visor and that made all the difference.       

I removed all the stickers I could but in the middle of the night I could feel one that kept getting caught on the sheet. It is more difficult to remove a sticker when you are half a sleep.

The next day I examined the rubber hose. There were stickers in the hose waiting to attach themselves to an unsuspecting person attempting to use the hose.  I took the hose to the trash container and disposed of it.

Yesterday I took my lopping shears and cut most of the cactus down. There is still some cactus left but it would be difficult to accidently get into it now.

              On another subject; as you know the Fords of Hewitt are on a fixed income. We attempt to save as much money as possible and I have discovered a unique method of saving money. In the photo below you see water being showered onto a Bougainvillea plant.

               I have found that I can water the hanging plants and take a shower at the same time. The neighbors don’t mind as they know we are on a fixed income. The one neighbor asked that I keep my back turned toward his house while taking my shower.

From the waterologist mind of     Don Ford

Disclaimer: waterologist is not a made up word, it is real! It is real in my world.

All rights reserved; any reproduction or distribution without written permission is strictly prohibited.