Ground Hogs Day is a crock of BS. It is obviously something that started in the north because they had nothing to do during those cold snow filled winter months.
As I understand it, Grandpa decided that he would tell his grandkids a story because it was so cold and nasty outside, they couldn’t go out. The kids were complaining about not being able to go outside (this was back in the olden days when kids played outside) so Grandpa said, in a calm yet all-knowing voice, “today is a special day”! The grand kids stopped complaining for a moment and listen to their wise grandpa.
Grandpa had to think quickly, then it popped in his wise mind, today is special because it is ground hogs day. The grand kids had a look of disbelief on their faces as they asked, “What is ground hog day?” Grandpa, confidently stated, it is the day that all ground hogs come out of their burro to stretch their legs. If they don’t see their shadow they go back in the burro because there will be more winter weather. If they see their shadow then they can stay outside, because winter is ending.
Does that sound odd to you? Well, that is the way it started, but later when some career politicians got involved they changed it to, “if the ground hog sees a shadow it means more winter”.
Ground Hog, who in their right mind would have named this animal, “a Hog of the Ground”. This thing don’t even look like a pig. Have you ever tried to eat one of those so called Ground Hogs? There is no ham and no bacon taste.
The one and only, “Punxsutawney Phil”, who came up with that name? Punxsutawney is the name of a town in some foreign state, who would want to live in a town named, “Punxsutawney”, couldn’t they come up with a decent name like, Mexia, TX or Goldthwaite, TX. Good solid names that have a meaning to people.
Phil is the animal’s nick name, which is short for Phillip, what animal wants to be name Phillip.
Everyone knows that a soil pig, I mean ground hog can’t predict the future! If you want to predict the future weather, you go to the Armadillo. These friendly little guys can accurately predict the weather, but they do not like the publicity so they try to stay out of sight digging in your garden and yards for the occasional tasty root or grub worm.
Yes the Armadillo helps rid your yard of grub worms, do you think a ground pig would do that?
Have you ever eaten an Armadillo egg? They are made of a Jalapeno pepper, stuffed with good things like cheese and chicken and wrapped in bacon, I don’t know how they get out of the armadillo, but they are good. Do you think something that comes out of a ground hog would be good?
I want to suggest that each of you write a letter to your congressmen or woman and ask them to cancel this ground hog day, and change it to Armadillo Day!
Enjoy an Armadillo egg today!
Don Ford
Some of the above information may be fictional.
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